If you are unhappy with yourself or the life you’re living, it may be time to re-evaluate YOU. Where have the best parts of you gone? Life happens, but your essence remains even though you might feel disconnected from yourself lately.

You are free to re-evaluate your life and change paths as many times as you need to, but the clearer you get on these questions, the deeper you dig, the quicker you’ll find yourself thriving and resurfacing the best parts of YOU.

It all starts with questions to yourself about yourself. Here are some:

*When were you happiest? What were you doing? What were you saying?

This is not to lament or reminisce about the past woefully, but rather to redirect yourself to the WHY you were so happy.

*What were you passionate about as a child? What did you love to do?

This goes along with “happiest moments.” The pressures of “adulting” tends to force us to let go of what brought us joy as a kid. The things we were good at without thinking about the results or rewards. The things that called to us … just because.

*What are you obsessed about now? What gives you energy? What motivates you?

This is another way to think about your “passions.” What consumes your attention? What can you get lost in, with the hours going by, before you realize it? These are the activities that can sustain your attention to the highs and lows of life.

*What increases your frustration? What drains you? What keeps you up at night?

This is about the process of elimination. Identifying what you do not want can clear the path for what you do want.

*What struggles are you willing to tolerate?

This is about the old saying “no pain, no gain.” Life throws curveballs at us. Sometimes we duck and dodge them, other times we get hit in the face. And then there are those times we can learn to flow a bit easier. Anticipating that there will be obstacles helps you to prepare and plan. It is not about dwelling in the fear of struggles, but rather embracing them!

*Are you willing to learn and be a student?

Allowing yourself a learning curve for new activities can be terrifying and exciting. Just remember that your body registers both fear and excitement in similar ways (shortness of breath, increased heart rate and muscle tension). It is our Mind and Soul that gives meaning. You get to decide if your activity is an adventure.

Some final thoughts:

Write these questions down! Seeing things in black and white helps to take them from the abstract voice in our head to the visual picture on paper. All writing is therapeutic. All writing helps us discover AND rediscover our Self. Sit quietly with yourself and ask these questions, and any others that come to mind.

And expect pushback from others! When we decide to shift, it impacts others around us. Change is challenging and so is its impact. Carry on anyway.

Be gentle with yourself. Take baby steps into this “new” Self. Even rediscovering yourself can be scary as you may not have seen that part of yourself in a long time.