Resentments are negative feelings that come from past hurts, from re-experiencing past injustices and the old feelings of anger associated with them. It is like a fire that continues to smolder, never fully going out. Holding on to this fire can eventually burn you.
There is an old adage that says: when you resent somebody, you become their slave.
Some ideas to help you let go of the past:
Identify the underlying feelings that go with anger: usually hurt or sadness. Sit with these feelings and the vulnerability they bring up.
In a safe space, allow the anger to simply be. Visualize the feeling and hold space for it.
Own the role you played in the situation that created these feelings.
Anger is a necessary emotion for all of us. It is a protective one. Sharing feelings with a trusted support system, journaling or or releasing them through physical exercise are just some ways to honor the emotion while staying safe.
Develop a different connection with your body through conscious breathing, positive self talk, or visualization.
It might feel comforting to dwell on the negative. Keep positive company and reframe the situation.
Acknowledging our anger and resentment, and intentionally channeling it can allow us to regain the power that we often “give away” to others.
